What is your chief concern in life right now? Most likely you answered, “To have happiness or joy.”
There is a difference between happiness and joy. The word “joy” is used 224 times in the Bible (NIV), whereas the words “happy” and “happiness” combined are used only thirty times. That is not a coincidence. Happiness is dependant on circumstances, like a job promotion, or getting married, or finding out you are pregnant. Ralph Waldo Trine wrote, "To get up each morning with the resolve to be happy... is to set our own conditions to the events of each day."
Joy is different. It is dependant on a relationship with God. Jesus, preparing the disciples for his departure said, “You're going to be in deep mourning. You'll be sad, very sad, but your sadness will develop into joy. When a woman gives birth, she has a hard time, there's no getting around it. “But when the baby is born, there is joy in the birth.” John 16:20-21 If you’ve endured childbirth, you understand Jesus’ point.
Many see depression today as more a spiritual crisis when the issue becomes; What am I here for? Where is joy and laughter in life? What’s my purpose?
Before lasting peace and joy can be found, we must answer these questions.
Christian psychotherapist Dr. Les Carter agrees that a modest amount of depression can be a sign of a hungry spirit. He wrote, “Life is a journey, and our efforts to relate appropriately are meaningless if we do not stay focused on where we come from and where we are going.”
We’re all spiritual beings. It is when our spirit unites with God’s that we find true peace, joy, and fulfillment. Depression can even produce insight and wisdom that can be had in no other way.
From his years of experience caring for the depressed, Dr. Walter Johnson wrote, “Although I am convinced, and indeed scientific evidence is very strong in this area, that in many cases biological factors are a predominant cause of depression, I am very insistent that spiritual counseling is of the utmost importance in treating depressed individuals in conjunction, when necessary, with antidepressant medications.”
This is an excerpt from the devotional book: I’m God’s Girl? Why Can’t I Feel It? I would recommend purchasing a self-help book on how to defeat depression God’s way and challenge negative thoughts. Learn to see the world in a hopeful, positive light.
Monday, January 4, 2010
The Problem with Perfectionism
Negative thinking says, I must be painstakingly competent and perfect in order to consider myself worthwhile. I must work hard to be loved. Add to that: I am a perfectionist.
We live in a world that defines a person's value and worth by productivity. How much we get done and how well we do it are the benchmarks of a successful day. This doesn't come without a cost. One of the leading causes of depression is having standards so high you cannot live up to them.
Defined as anxious slavery or slow suicide, perfectionists feel they need to prove their value to avoid the threat of rejection. Guilty!
There is a certain amount of tension in every Christian's mind concerning the biblical call to perfection. In one compartment of the brain there's a tug to live up to all the standards of Christ, but then on the other side, our attempts to measure up to those standards are always flawed.
As a ministry leader often I find myself falling back into the perfection rut, feeling I have to meet some very high expectations. What has been very freeing to me is to realize that when God called me to ministry he knew what he was getting. A couple months down the road he didn’t say, “Bad decision. I shouldn’t have called her!” Companies say that. People say that. Not God. That’s the freedom of grace. You are already completely acceptable to God as imperfect as you are. Thank you Jesus!
God defines personhood and success very differently than our culture does. The measure of our life is not where we live, how we look, or how well we sew or cook. From his perspective, success is measured by what kind of person we are, even in the midst of life's challenges.
God’s grace is greater than our imperfections, than our sin, and far greater than Satan (Rom. 5:20-21). “Christ redeemed [freed] us from the curse of the law [the curse of perfectionism] by becoming a curse for us” (Gal. 3:13, my emphasis). Jesus Christ became (past tense) the curse for us, freeing us from all perfectionistic law traps. Perfection means a perfect union with God for which we were created.
Banish the perfectionista in you! James 3:2 proclaims we all stumble in many ways. Nobody, apart from God, is perfect. People will always fail, disappoint and hurt us. We will make mistakes, even humiliate ourselves. God gives us an incredible gift when we become his daughter—grace. Today, give yourself grace.
If perfectionism has lead to significant problems with depression, anxiety, eating disorders, or difficulties in your relationships, you may want to consider working through one of the books I’ve written: http://www.olivebranchoutreach.com/shopping.htm
You may want to seek expert help from an experienced mental health professional, such as a psychologist or psychiatrist. Your family doctor is a good place to start if you are looking for a referral.
This is an excerpt from “Breaking the Cover Girl Mask.”
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Is there hope for my depression?
With the holidays behind us life should be turning back to “normal.” But I know for many, they were brought down by the blues or depression because of the holidays and cannot seem to find “normal.” I believe the holidays remind us of how lonely many of us are.
Dr. Robert McGee, author of Search for Significance wrote, “Loneliness has already reached epidemic proportions … 92% of Christians attending a Bible conference admitted that feelings of loneliness are a major problem in their lives. All shared a basic symptom: a sense of despair at feeling unloved and fear of being unwanted or unaccepted. ”
What a tragic commentary. A study published in the journal, The Archives of General Psychiatry suggested that about one in four people diagnosed with depression might instead be struggling with emotions associated with the loss of a loved one, or a job, or some other event in the person's life-- the blues. Many people describe themselves as depressed when they are really discouraged or unhappy or lonely.
Depression can be brought on by biochemistry as well as the loss of a loved one, unemployment, or even a bout of ill health. When we lose the ability to enjoy things, or feel badly about ourselves, believing we do not deserve to be happy, or feel guilty for no reason, or blame ourselves for something we had no part in, this is when we are likely to experience depression. Depression goes beyond the blues. Depression is generally a result of anger turned inward and/or a deep sense of loss.
You may have the blues, or be genuinely depressed. In either case, lost in your feelings you are clinging to a thread of hope that something or someone will break through the fog of despair because we all have the desire to have joy in our lives. But I have good news! God is throwing your soul an anchor.
If we don’t have union with God, life holds no hope. Recovery simply means recovering God’s plan for our life. It takes courage to step forward and say, “I want help to be free from my burdens.” This journey requires we follow God willingly, and trust him to lead us safely through the pain and around unseen obstacles. He knows the safest and best route. The word journey is repeated to convey that change doesn’t happen overnight. God doesn’t always work in the way that seems most logical to us. Instead of guiding the Israelites along the most direct route from Egypt to the Promised Land, He took them on a longer route.
However, everyday you can enjoy the place where you are while you travel down this road. Nothing is as heartbreaking as wasted grief. We can be determined to learn from it, rather than be bound by it. Along the way you will find out who you really are --God’s Girl.
This is an excerpt from the devotional book: I’m God’s Girl? Why Can’t I Feel It? I would recommend purchasing a self-help book on how to defeat depression God’s way and challenge negative thoughts. Learn to see the world in a hopeful, positive light.
For Christ-based help consider working through one of the books I’ve written: http://www.olivebranchoutreach.com/shopping.htm
• I’m God’s Girl? Why Can’t I Feel It? Daily Biblical Encouragement to Defeat Depression & the Blues
• Breaking the Cover Girl Mask: Toss Out Toxic Thoughts
You may want to seek expert help from an experienced mental health professional, such as a psychologist or psychiatrist. Your family doctor is a good place to start if you are looking for a referral.
Dr. Robert McGee, author of Search for Significance wrote, “Loneliness has already reached epidemic proportions … 92% of Christians attending a Bible conference admitted that feelings of loneliness are a major problem in their lives. All shared a basic symptom: a sense of despair at feeling unloved and fear of being unwanted or unaccepted. ”
What a tragic commentary. A study published in the journal, The Archives of General Psychiatry suggested that about one in four people diagnosed with depression might instead be struggling with emotions associated with the loss of a loved one, or a job, or some other event in the person's life-- the blues. Many people describe themselves as depressed when they are really discouraged or unhappy or lonely.
Depression can be brought on by biochemistry as well as the loss of a loved one, unemployment, or even a bout of ill health. When we lose the ability to enjoy things, or feel badly about ourselves, believing we do not deserve to be happy, or feel guilty for no reason, or blame ourselves for something we had no part in, this is when we are likely to experience depression. Depression goes beyond the blues. Depression is generally a result of anger turned inward and/or a deep sense of loss.
You may have the blues, or be genuinely depressed. In either case, lost in your feelings you are clinging to a thread of hope that something or someone will break through the fog of despair because we all have the desire to have joy in our lives. But I have good news! God is throwing your soul an anchor.
If we don’t have union with God, life holds no hope. Recovery simply means recovering God’s plan for our life. It takes courage to step forward and say, “I want help to be free from my burdens.” This journey requires we follow God willingly, and trust him to lead us safely through the pain and around unseen obstacles. He knows the safest and best route. The word journey is repeated to convey that change doesn’t happen overnight. God doesn’t always work in the way that seems most logical to us. Instead of guiding the Israelites along the most direct route from Egypt to the Promised Land, He took them on a longer route.
However, everyday you can enjoy the place where you are while you travel down this road. Nothing is as heartbreaking as wasted grief. We can be determined to learn from it, rather than be bound by it. Along the way you will find out who you really are --God’s Girl.
This is an excerpt from the devotional book: I’m God’s Girl? Why Can’t I Feel It? I would recommend purchasing a self-help book on how to defeat depression God’s way and challenge negative thoughts. Learn to see the world in a hopeful, positive light.
For Christ-based help consider working through one of the books I’ve written: http://www.olivebranchoutreach.com/shopping.htm
• I’m God’s Girl? Why Can’t I Feel It? Daily Biblical Encouragement to Defeat Depression & the Blues
• Breaking the Cover Girl Mask: Toss Out Toxic Thoughts
You may want to seek expert help from an experienced mental health professional, such as a psychologist or psychiatrist. Your family doctor is a good place to start if you are looking for a referral.
Friday, December 25, 2009
Celebrating Christmas—Celebrating Life
The Christmas season is a time of celebration for Christians. We sing about and rejoice in the birth of the Savior. Friends and family gather for the feast and the little ones rip through their presents. But do not forget this earth-shattering truth: The birth of Jesus was the sign that God had invaded earth. And that gives us the real reason to celebrate Christmas.
The virgin birth made possible the uniting of full deity and full humanity in one person—called the incarnation. Jesus was the God-man. Not God dwelling in a man. Not a man deified; but God and man, combining in one personality the two natures, baffling every possibility of explanation.
I get it now. Christ, the God-man, suffered for me, and for you. Our sin was poured into the sinless Christ at his crucifixion. His righteousness is then poured into us at our conversion. This is what Christians mean by Christ’s atonement for sin. Now when God looks down at us, he sees us through the lens of the Cross—sin free. This is a reason to celebrate life!
The number one need in every person’ life is to be immersed in a personal and intimate relationship with God through Jesus. Everyone needs a relationship with someone that can make then feel safe and loved. Jesus is that person. Acknowledge your need for Jesus. Recognize your vulnerability. Recognize you can no longer carry your burdens. Lay them at Jesus’s feet. Find comfort for your soul.
He is the only one who can touch you without hurting or breaking you. Mankind can’t promise that. He can nurse you back to spiritual health, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. …learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls” (Matthew 11:28-30). Jesus longed to give people life. All they need to do is come to him. That’s all.
Thursday, December 24, 2009
Holiday Help for Anorexia, Bulimia and Binge Eating Sufferers
I suffered from bulima for 17 years and I know how hard the holidays are--physically, mentally, and realtionally. These are some things that have worked for me and others:
1. Spend the holidays with the people who love you—people who build you up and not tear you down. Share your observations. Help and encourage one another. [And if you love someone with an eating disorder, get in touch. Don’t let them spend this time alone.]
2. If you have to spend time with family members who trigger the worst in you, journal your thoughts and insights. One way to begin breaking down a wall is through journaling. Many have found writing helpful in coming to terms with the past, or processing fresh pain. Suggested entries: Thoughts and Emotions; Physical Sensations; What you did; What you could do next time.
3. Keep track of your goals before you head out to grandma's house—journal them. Write out and track your overall plans, nutrition plan and your thoughts about it.
4. Memorize Scripture. Write it on a card & carry it with you [or use a scripture memorization program like Memlok.]
5. Tis’ the season to be grateful: to gain perspective. Carla told me she’d write down 5 things each night that Ishe was thankful for... "helped me see that my focus on food/eating/starving/weight was really pointless, and to look at what I have that so many people don't have in this world. It helped get the focus off of ME (the eating disorder's focus on ME has really messed up my perspective)."
6. Check out my website: www.olivebranchoutreach.com/edindex.htlm for lots of inspiration, Scripture and help.
7. For Christ-based help consider working through one of the books I’ve written: http://www.olivebranchoutreach.com/shopping.htm
· I’m Beautiful? Why Can’t I See It? Daily Encouragement to Promote Healthy Eating and Positive Self-Esteem
· I’m God’s Girl? Why Can’t I Feel It? Daily Biblical Encouragmeent to Defeat Depression & the Blues
· Breaking the Cover Girl Mask: Toss Out Toxic Thoughts
Merry Christmas!
Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying, "Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace to men on whom his favor rests." — Luke 2:13-14
1. Spend the holidays with the people who love you—people who build you up and not tear you down. Share your observations. Help and encourage one another. [And if you love someone with an eating disorder, get in touch. Don’t let them spend this time alone.]
2. If you have to spend time with family members who trigger the worst in you, journal your thoughts and insights. One way to begin breaking down a wall is through journaling. Many have found writing helpful in coming to terms with the past, or processing fresh pain. Suggested entries: Thoughts and Emotions; Physical Sensations; What you did; What you could do next time.
3. Keep track of your goals before you head out to grandma's house—journal them. Write out and track your overall plans, nutrition plan and your thoughts about it.
4. Memorize Scripture. Write it on a card & carry it with you [or use a scripture memorization program like Memlok.]
5. Tis’ the season to be grateful: to gain perspective. Carla told me she’d write down 5 things each night that Ishe was thankful for... "helped me see that my focus on food/eating/starving/weight was really pointless, and to look at what I have that so many people don't have in this world. It helped get the focus off of ME (the eating disorder's focus on ME has really messed up my perspective)."
6. Check out my website: www.olivebranchoutreach.com/edindex.htlm for lots of inspiration, Scripture and help.
7. For Christ-based help consider working through one of the books I’ve written: http://www.olivebranchoutreach.com/shopping.htm
· I’m Beautiful? Why Can’t I See It? Daily Encouragement to Promote Healthy Eating and Positive Self-Esteem
· I’m God’s Girl? Why Can’t I Feel It? Daily Biblical Encouragmeent to Defeat Depression & the Blues
· Breaking the Cover Girl Mask: Toss Out Toxic Thoughts
Merry Christmas!
Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying, "Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace to men on whom his favor rests." — Luke 2:13-14
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Inspiring Positive Thinking
Well the day has finally come—a new look for Olive Branch Outreach and the release of my latest book, “Breaking the Cover Girl Mask: Toss Out Toxic Thoughts.” Today the press release goes out and I ma praying the women who need this book most (which is most of us), those struggling with ongoing negative thinking, will get a copy sooner than later. Of course, I am trusting in God as he is the only one who can make that happen. I’m merely joining him in his plan—writing and doing things to market the book. God gets the praise and glory for the work!
Here is the press release:
Oregon Author Inspires Positive Thinking in Latest Book
MOLALLA, OR - Many women suffer from low self-esteem, negative thoughts, and depression, perhaps from old wounds and lies they continue to believe. But there's no freedom from these things without total mind renewal, says Oregon author and women's pastor Kimberly Davidson.
In her third book, "Breaking the Cover Girl Mask," Davidson urges women to get rid of the negative-the toxic thinking that's affecting their entire being. Drawing from personal and ministerial experience, Davidson teaches readers how they can confront and heal harmful thought patterns and behaviors, regain control of their lives, and experience personal growth.
Molly Theissen, writer and editor, says, "[The author's] aim to help Christian women readjust their thoughts, emotions, and ambitions in order to set a pace for a healthier lifestyle is truly admirable. [Her] writing style is engaging, and [she has] a great sense of knowing [her] audience."
Published by Tate Publishing and Enterprises, the book is available through bookstores nationwide, from me at www.olivebranchoutreach.com, or the publisher at www.tatepublishing.com/bookstore, or by visiting barnesandnoble.com or amazon.com.
Pastoral counselor, personal life coach, and founder of Olive Branch Outreach, Davidson received her MA in specialized ministry from Western Seminary and BA in health sciences and nutrition from the University of Iowa. She speaks at church conferences and schools and offers dynamic workshops to reach youth and women with her messages. The author previously released "I'm God's Girl? Why Can't I Feel It?" and "I'm Beautiful? Why Can't I See It?"
For promotional inquiries, please contact Amanda Soderberg, Marketing Representative, at (888) 361-9473 or send an email to asoderberg@tatepublishing.com.
Friday, November 27, 2009
Toss Out Toxic Thinking
Has anyone ever said to you, "You need to change your mind!" If your mind was a movie screen for everyone to view, what would they see? Would your screenplay be rated G, R, or NC-17?
The bottom line is, there is no freedom without a change of mind. I'm so exccited that my new book, "Breaking the Cover Girl Mask: Toss Out Toxic Thoughts" will be released on December 15th. My website, Olive Branch Outreach is undergoing it's own transformation to provide information, resources and solutions to toxic thinking.
Stay tuned for December 15th! God bless,
The bottom line is, there is no freedom without a change of mind. I'm so exccited that my new book, "Breaking the Cover Girl Mask: Toss Out Toxic Thoughts" will be released on December 15th. My website, Olive Branch Outreach is undergoing it's own transformation to provide information, resources and solutions to toxic thinking.
Stay tuned for December 15th! God bless,
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