Unforgiveness is guaranteed to hinder our growth because it plants roots of bitterness in our heart. It’s like pouring acid in us, a caustic substance that eats through our heart. Why is it so hard for us to “forgive and forget” the injuries of life?
God never promised any of us freedom from pain. We can begin to find happiness if we free our mind of resentment and bitterness—put the past behind and see the process as empowering. you can hold that person responsible, harbor hatred, and consequently, carry feelings of anger forever. Or you can begin healing when you chose to forgive. In order to heal, we must forgive again and again—the big wrongs and the little ones. The alternative is to hold on to hatred and bitterness, which eventually will hurt all our relationships. Give yourself grace.
Sheila Walsh wrote, “In my situation, as long as I was unwilling to let go and forgive, there was still a nail in my wrist, and every time I talked to someone about the situation, it cut in a little deeper." It is our responsibility to pull out that nail. Many people won’t choose to forgive. They live unhappy lives of bitterness and unforgiveness.
Dr. Gregory Jantz says, If the child of the past and the adult of the present are to integrate fully into the person of the future, there comes a time when both must release the hurts of the past. This doesn’t mean that you forget what has been done to you, but that you forgive those responsible, whether they deserve your forgiveness or not. Forgiveness is the final destination on your healing journey. The road that lies beyond is one of health.
What is your greatest battle with forgiveness?
What lack of forgiveness or bitterness is still attached to you?
Read this excerpt from “I’m Beautiful? Why Can’t I See It?” by Kimberly Davidson.
Showing posts with label depression. Show all posts
Showing posts with label depression. Show all posts
Monday, June 28, 2010
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
My story: Saving Opheila
Ophelia, in Shakespeare’s Hamlet, illustrates the destructive forces affecting young women. Ophelia is a typical girl, footloose and fancy-free. But she loses herself in adolescence. She falls in love with Hamlet and lives only for his approval. She doesn’t have a relationship with God and the insight of the Holy Spirit to guide and direct her, so she lives merely to meet Hamlet’s and her father’s demands. Who she is, her value, is determined solely by their approval, and she is torn apart. She goes mad with grief. Elegantly dressed, tragically she drowns in a stream filled with flowers.
For twenty years I lived an Ophelia existence. I attempted to take control of my mind, yet I couldn’t conquer the addiction to food, alcohol, cigarettes, diet pills, and my promiscuous behavior. As a kid, our family moved quite a bit. The first move from America to London, England. I was teased by schoolmates because I didn’t fit into the culture. I was unlike them because I had an accent. I felt stupid because I needed a tutor. I was weird because my clothes were different. Weirdo! What I heard was, “You do not belong” and “You are not accepted.”
We moved back to America when I was twelve. Again I was weird and different, but now I was entering adolescence—the hurricane years. The pain of rejection became part of my normal thought process. I expected people not to like me. We moved several more times. I fell in with the wild crowd, feeling the pressure to fit in. I smoked cigarettes and tried alcohol and drugs. This group gave me a sense of belonging and a means to forget the rejection and losses.
Then I began to gravitate into a new world of worshipping celebrities and models. I believed the lie that to be popular you have to look like a model. Teen magazines say, Don’t worry about being good, worry about looking good and being socially accepted!
As a teen I pretty much turned off my God-given talents and gifts in search of the Western culture’s definition of ideal. I set my sights on being a super model.
When I announced this in my sixth-grade class, a few boys laughed, “Yeah, you’ll be a supermodel…for MAD Magazine.” Translation, You’re ugly. Give it up! I didn’t give it up. I’d do anything to be a beautiful super model or celebrity. And why not? In this culture celebrity and beauty has its rewards. This was the beginning of what I call the Cover Girl masquerade . . . and the spiral downwards began.
The spiral began innocently enough with a simple diet. My senior year in high school I lost fifteen pounds and looked remarkable. I received compliments and praise from my parents and friends…and I wanted more. I felt accepted and loved. I belong! Now I’ll be popular! The disordered eating thought process began in high school but exploded when I entered college and joined a sorority.
Before I knew it I was a full-blown bulimic, a disease that took over my life. I wish someone had said to me, “Great, you’re now a size six. There are a million other size sixes out there. What’s different about you? What is about you, Kimberly the person, that shines?” That would have stung a little, but hopefully have pointed me towards working on my inside. Instead, I worked tirelessly trying to conform to this culture’s image of the stick, thin woman.
As I grew into adulthood, my self-esteem continued to deteriorate. Clearly, by bingeing and purging I was self-medicating—the stress, anxieties, and pain. And then my body started desiring and needing the alcohol. Alcohol abuse usually leads to inappropriate sexual behavior. I couldn’t stop the promiscuity. I did what I thought I should do in order to be accepted. Again, I justified it. Everyone else is sleeping around. It was a way to fill the hole in my heart. But it only deepened the wounds of shame, humiliation, and abandonment.
I eventually got pregnant and chose to have an abortion—another demon o deal with. I had a major life choice to grapple with--to bring this baby to term, or abort it. There was no doubt in my mind that abortion was the answer. After all, I wasn’t married, I had an established lifestyle, and I would have brought embarrassment and shame upon my parents. When I chose abortion, I was really choosing to purge my baby, like the food I ate. I could clearly see that at that time in my life I didn’t value myself, so how could I value my baby’s life? You could say the monster bulimia took two innocent lives. After I had the abortion, I chose to bury this experience like a wrecked ship, on the bottom of an ocean.
Like Ophelia, I was in danger of drowning. It was beginning to look like a life or death situation. It was vital I be revived. I needed someone to point me to Jesus Christ. “In my distress I called to the LORD; I cried to my God for help. From his temple he heard my voice; my cry came before him, into his ears” (Ps. 18:6).
God sent that person and he took me to church. Jesus walked into my messed up life and a couple months later I was saved. The Bible says, “That if you confess with your mouth, ‘Jesus is Lord,’ and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved” (Rom. 10:9).
Jesus pronounced, “Daughter, You’re free to go. I’ve done the time for you (Acts 2; 2 Cor. 3:17). Now go and tell the world what you have experienced.” The shackles melted. Evil evaporated. Jesus will always meet us right where we are at. We don’t have to be good enough, smart enough or religious enough to earn an audience with him. We can have a personal, intimate relationship with the God Almighty.
My identity changed because God adopted me into his family. God took all my guilty acts and thoughts, and placed them on Jesus. At that moment, he said, “Kimberly, you are forgiven. Every offense is wiped from your record.” God forgives and forgets—completely, and I became righteous—perfect before God. No external makeover can compare to the internal makeover we receive from Jesus Christ!
Excerpt from Kimberly’s book: Breaking the Cover Girl Mask: Toss Out Toxic Thoughts
.
For twenty years I lived an Ophelia existence. I attempted to take control of my mind, yet I couldn’t conquer the addiction to food, alcohol, cigarettes, diet pills, and my promiscuous behavior. As a kid, our family moved quite a bit. The first move from America to London, England. I was teased by schoolmates because I didn’t fit into the culture. I was unlike them because I had an accent. I felt stupid because I needed a tutor. I was weird because my clothes were different. Weirdo! What I heard was, “You do not belong” and “You are not accepted.”
We moved back to America when I was twelve. Again I was weird and different, but now I was entering adolescence—the hurricane years. The pain of rejection became part of my normal thought process. I expected people not to like me. We moved several more times. I fell in with the wild crowd, feeling the pressure to fit in. I smoked cigarettes and tried alcohol and drugs. This group gave me a sense of belonging and a means to forget the rejection and losses.
Then I began to gravitate into a new world of worshipping celebrities and models. I believed the lie that to be popular you have to look like a model. Teen magazines say, Don’t worry about being good, worry about looking good and being socially accepted!
As a teen I pretty much turned off my God-given talents and gifts in search of the Western culture’s definition of ideal. I set my sights on being a super model.
When I announced this in my sixth-grade class, a few boys laughed, “Yeah, you’ll be a supermodel…for MAD Magazine.” Translation, You’re ugly. Give it up! I didn’t give it up. I’d do anything to be a beautiful super model or celebrity. And why not? In this culture celebrity and beauty has its rewards. This was the beginning of what I call the Cover Girl masquerade . . . and the spiral downwards began.
The spiral began innocently enough with a simple diet. My senior year in high school I lost fifteen pounds and looked remarkable. I received compliments and praise from my parents and friends…and I wanted more. I felt accepted and loved. I belong! Now I’ll be popular! The disordered eating thought process began in high school but exploded when I entered college and joined a sorority.
Before I knew it I was a full-blown bulimic, a disease that took over my life. I wish someone had said to me, “Great, you’re now a size six. There are a million other size sixes out there. What’s different about you? What is about you, Kimberly the person, that shines?” That would have stung a little, but hopefully have pointed me towards working on my inside. Instead, I worked tirelessly trying to conform to this culture’s image of the stick, thin woman.
As I grew into adulthood, my self-esteem continued to deteriorate. Clearly, by bingeing and purging I was self-medicating—the stress, anxieties, and pain. And then my body started desiring and needing the alcohol. Alcohol abuse usually leads to inappropriate sexual behavior. I couldn’t stop the promiscuity. I did what I thought I should do in order to be accepted. Again, I justified it. Everyone else is sleeping around. It was a way to fill the hole in my heart. But it only deepened the wounds of shame, humiliation, and abandonment.
I eventually got pregnant and chose to have an abortion—another demon o deal with. I had a major life choice to grapple with--to bring this baby to term, or abort it. There was no doubt in my mind that abortion was the answer. After all, I wasn’t married, I had an established lifestyle, and I would have brought embarrassment and shame upon my parents. When I chose abortion, I was really choosing to purge my baby, like the food I ate. I could clearly see that at that time in my life I didn’t value myself, so how could I value my baby’s life? You could say the monster bulimia took two innocent lives. After I had the abortion, I chose to bury this experience like a wrecked ship, on the bottom of an ocean.
Like Ophelia, I was in danger of drowning. It was beginning to look like a life or death situation. It was vital I be revived. I needed someone to point me to Jesus Christ. “In my distress I called to the LORD; I cried to my God for help. From his temple he heard my voice; my cry came before him, into his ears” (Ps. 18:6).
God sent that person and he took me to church. Jesus walked into my messed up life and a couple months later I was saved. The Bible says, “That if you confess with your mouth, ‘Jesus is Lord,’ and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved” (Rom. 10:9).
Jesus pronounced, “Daughter, You’re free to go. I’ve done the time for you (Acts 2; 2 Cor. 3:17). Now go and tell the world what you have experienced.” The shackles melted. Evil evaporated. Jesus will always meet us right where we are at. We don’t have to be good enough, smart enough or religious enough to earn an audience with him. We can have a personal, intimate relationship with the God Almighty.
My identity changed because God adopted me into his family. God took all my guilty acts and thoughts, and placed them on Jesus. At that moment, he said, “Kimberly, you are forgiven. Every offense is wiped from your record.” God forgives and forgets—completely, and I became righteous—perfect before God. No external makeover can compare to the internal makeover we receive from Jesus Christ!
Excerpt from Kimberly’s book: Breaking the Cover Girl Mask: Toss Out Toxic Thoughts
.
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
How to Help a Loved One Overcome Depression
For those suffering from depression, the support of friends and family members can be crucial to recovery. Depression is a medical condition that usually improves with treatment. Those with depression need the support to recover and faith in the Word of God.
In the Bible David provincially wrote, “Weeping may go on all night, but in the morning there is joy” (Psalm 30: 5). He wrote a majority of these heartfelt psalms. Like us, David describes his depression as being a pit. But, he also knew God’s promise of deliverance despite his present despair.
Our emotional and spiritual life is full of peaks and valleys, and we want immediate relief and answers. But, often, as with David, the Lord calls us to wait, which is the hardest part. Look ahead to the future. There is a way out. Thank God for where he will take you!
If you are worried about a loved one with depression, know how to recognize the symptoms of depression and worsening depression, offer emotional and practical support, and know what to do if suicide seems likely. Speak to the person about their symptoms and feelings, and encourage them to seek treatment from a psychologist or counselor.
This is an excerpt from the book: I'm God's GIrl? Why Can't I Feel It? Check out my website: www.olivebranchoutreach.com.htlm for inspiration, Scripture and help.
In the Bible David provincially wrote, “Weeping may go on all night, but in the morning there is joy” (Psalm 30: 5). He wrote a majority of these heartfelt psalms. Like us, David describes his depression as being a pit. But, he also knew God’s promise of deliverance despite his present despair.
Our emotional and spiritual life is full of peaks and valleys, and we want immediate relief and answers. But, often, as with David, the Lord calls us to wait, which is the hardest part. Look ahead to the future. There is a way out. Thank God for where he will take you!
If you are worried about a loved one with depression, know how to recognize the symptoms of depression and worsening depression, offer emotional and practical support, and know what to do if suicide seems likely. Speak to the person about their symptoms and feelings, and encourage them to seek treatment from a psychologist or counselor.
This is an excerpt from the book: I'm God's GIrl? Why Can't I Feel It? Check out my website: www.olivebranchoutreach.com.htlm for inspiration, Scripture and help.
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
A Jolly Heart
It’s been said the most wasted day is that in which we have not laughed. Did you know having a good laugh actually strengthens relationship bonds and makes for a stronger heart? Laughter, like water, flushes toxins out of our body. When we laugh, we have the ability to diffuse the pain by physically increasing the body’s production of endorphins, the body’s natural painkillers.
We need to laugh more. A jolly heart is the human gift for not only a healthy heart, but for coping and survival. It breaks the ice, lowers blood pressure, reduces your risk of developing heart disease, and improves mood. Someone who laughs, particularly at herself, can never take herself too seriously. It’s the certain cure for arrogance.
We are responsible for our heart’s care. A study found that just fifteen minutes of watching a funny movie increased average blood flow by 22 percent while watching a serious drama decreased blood flow by 35 percent. Fifteen minutes of laughter and thirty minutes of exercise three times a week is good for the vascular system.
Jesus understood this. He frequently used humor and wit to make his point, like when he mentioned a camel going through the eye of a needle. If anyone had cause for being negative, it was Jesus. His life couldn’t have been easy, facing satanic opposition and human ridicule. Yet Jesus felt joy because he knew his sufferings could not compare with the joy that awaited him. The same should be true for us.
It is no surprise King Solomon advised, “Above all else, guard your heart [or affections] for it is the wellspring of life” (Prov. 4:23, my emphasis). This is serious. Impossible? God never tells us to do something we can’t do in his strength (Phil. 4:13). “Be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power!” (Eph. 6:10)
We need to laugh more. A jolly heart is the human gift for not only a healthy heart, but for coping and survival. It breaks the ice, lowers blood pressure, reduces your risk of developing heart disease, and improves mood. Someone who laughs, particularly at herself, can never take herself too seriously. It’s the certain cure for arrogance.
We are responsible for our heart’s care. A study found that just fifteen minutes of watching a funny movie increased average blood flow by 22 percent while watching a serious drama decreased blood flow by 35 percent. Fifteen minutes of laughter and thirty minutes of exercise three times a week is good for the vascular system.
Jesus understood this. He frequently used humor and wit to make his point, like when he mentioned a camel going through the eye of a needle. If anyone had cause for being negative, it was Jesus. His life couldn’t have been easy, facing satanic opposition and human ridicule. Yet Jesus felt joy because he knew his sufferings could not compare with the joy that awaited him. The same should be true for us.
It is no surprise King Solomon advised, “Above all else, guard your heart [or affections] for it is the wellspring of life” (Prov. 4:23, my emphasis). This is serious. Impossible? God never tells us to do something we can’t do in his strength (Phil. 4:13). “Be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power!” (Eph. 6:10)
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
Your body believes every word you say!
We do not merely experience anger in our minds, we feel it biologically in our body—our muscles tense and stomachs ache. Understanding ourselves, and other people, is critical to mind change and our overall growth. If we were to look at our brain, we may see a dark abscess caused by the stronghold of anger. The same is true for envy, anxiety, lust, fear, depression, and other emotions.
The Bible says, “A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones” (Prov. 14:30). There is a direct correlation between pessimistic, toxic thinking and illness. If we do not have a change of mind, we can actually make ourselves sick! Our body truly speaks our mind.
Becoming aware of our negative thinking patterns is the first step in being able to replace them with truth based patterns of thought. There are two things we must do daily:
(1) Identify & interrogate the negative things and lies you say to yourself, thereby enabling yourself to replace distortions with truth, found in the Word of God.
(2) Submit your thoughts to Christ. This means consciously handing over anxiety, worry, pain, and bitterness. He stands prepared to take your load and break the chains of thought-bondage if you let him.
Socrates said the unexamined life is not worth living. Through prayer and self-examination, we can learn to submit our struggles because they are impossible to conquer in our own strength. Do you have an attitude of willingness to expose and examine your flaws?
This is an excerpt from the book: Breaking the Cover Girl Mask
Check out my website: www.olivebranchoutreach.com/edindex.htlm for lots of inspiration, Scripture and help.
The Bible says, “A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones” (Prov. 14:30). There is a direct correlation between pessimistic, toxic thinking and illness. If we do not have a change of mind, we can actually make ourselves sick! Our body truly speaks our mind.
Becoming aware of our negative thinking patterns is the first step in being able to replace them with truth based patterns of thought. There are two things we must do daily:
(1) Identify & interrogate the negative things and lies you say to yourself, thereby enabling yourself to replace distortions with truth, found in the Word of God.
(2) Submit your thoughts to Christ. This means consciously handing over anxiety, worry, pain, and bitterness. He stands prepared to take your load and break the chains of thought-bondage if you let him.
Socrates said the unexamined life is not worth living. Through prayer and self-examination, we can learn to submit our struggles because they are impossible to conquer in our own strength. Do you have an attitude of willingness to expose and examine your flaws?
This is an excerpt from the book: Breaking the Cover Girl Mask
Check out my website: www.olivebranchoutreach.com/edindex.htlm for lots of inspiration, Scripture and help.
Thursday, April 8, 2010
A Source of Negative Thinking
Last week I talked about how toxic thinking is influenced by three different, but related, ways: through the world, through spiritual warfare, and through our own flesh--our own nature.Today I want to focus on how “the world” can be a source of negative thinking. “The world” touches everyone in many different ways. Worldliness is the attitude that places, self, or things at the center of one’s aspirations and activities.
Secular usually means “belonging to this age or this world.” Worldliness, or secularism, is a worldview or lifestyle oriented toward the irreligious rather than the sacred, towards the natural rather than supernatural. It is the ungodly aspects of our culture, peer pressure, values, traditions, what is in, what is uncool, customs, philosophies and attitudes.
Secularism is guilty of having “exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator” (Romans 1:25).
Although believers are told not to be conformed to this world (Rom. 12:2) we nonetheless are influenced by it. Most Christians live in two different worlds: the one on Sunday morning and the one that includes rest of the week. In practice, both worlds clash. Our disposition, temperament and habits are manipulated through the workplace, media and entertainment industries, advertising, the education system, peer groups; world views and philosophies. No doubt our minds are more at risk now than ever.
If we follow the world’s ways, we miss God’s blessings. Jesus’s disciple John said, “Don't love the world's ways. Don't love the world's goods. Love of the world squeezes out love for the Father” (1 John 2:15, Msg).
This is an excerpt from the book: Breaking the Cover Girl Mask: Toss Out Toxic Thoughts
Secular usually means “belonging to this age or this world.” Worldliness, or secularism, is a worldview or lifestyle oriented toward the irreligious rather than the sacred, towards the natural rather than supernatural. It is the ungodly aspects of our culture, peer pressure, values, traditions, what is in, what is uncool, customs, philosophies and attitudes.
Secularism is guilty of having “exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator” (Romans 1:25).
Although believers are told not to be conformed to this world (Rom. 12:2) we nonetheless are influenced by it. Most Christians live in two different worlds: the one on Sunday morning and the one that includes rest of the week. In practice, both worlds clash. Our disposition, temperament and habits are manipulated through the workplace, media and entertainment industries, advertising, the education system, peer groups; world views and philosophies. No doubt our minds are more at risk now than ever.
If we follow the world’s ways, we miss God’s blessings. Jesus’s disciple John said, “Don't love the world's ways. Don't love the world's goods. Love of the world squeezes out love for the Father” (1 John 2:15, Msg).
This is an excerpt from the book: Breaking the Cover Girl Mask: Toss Out Toxic Thoughts
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Depression strategy: recognize negative thoughts, feelings of being low and sad and take action!
Old thinking says: I can do it by myself! Or, we may use Scarlett O’Hara’s method of dealing with reality (Gone With The Wind): “I’ll think about that tomorrow.” God is challenging us not to go this alone. We need him and other people. Think and pray about beginning to connect with friends and church if you aren’t doing so. A small fellowship group or Bible study is an excellent resource for sharing, encouragement, and comfort. God wants all of us to be in an environment where we can experience his love through our relationships with other believers.
Secondly, you may feel now is the time to talk to a professional therapist. A special notation if you are coping with sexual abuse: you may believe because the abuse happened decades ago, there is nothing you can do about it now. Ignoring painful feelings may have been adaptive at the time the abuse happened (a child lacks control over the abuse). However, continuing to avoid bad feelings as an adult can lead women to stay in painful situations. Ignoring the abuse can put you at further risk for depression.
Guidelines for finding a counselor:
Seek a counselor that is Christian, or offers a spirituality component. Locate a counselor who takes the opportunity to take you to the Word of God, to teach you about the character and ways of God, to help you see the necessity of total surrender to Jesus Christ as Lord. Charles Stanley said, “If it’s (psychotherapy) not based on the Word of God, all you have is just somebody’s opinion, you have some ways or some steps, but apart from God, they’re still depending upon themselves. If you leave God out of it, it becomes: "what can I do?"
Ask for a personal referral. Ideally, try to get a recommendation from a therapist's client. If you can't find that, ask your doctor or pastor for a few names. Look for a licensed psychologist, social worker, or family therapist who shares your values and faith (psychiatrists typically don't do much counseling).
Evaluate. After your first visit, ask yourself: Did I feel heard and valued? Did I feel comfortable? If you answer no to any of these, keep searching for the right fit. It may be a good idea to give a therapist a second chance if you feel hurt or upset.
Finances and logistics. Is this counselor covered by your insurance policy? Is the cost doable? Typically, psychologists are most expensive, followed by social workers and family therapists. Is the office location convenient for you?
This is an excerpt from the devotional book: I’m God’s Girl? Why Can’t I Feel It?
Check out my website: www.olivebranchoutreach.com/edindex.htlm for lots of inspiration, Scripture and help.
Secondly, you may feel now is the time to talk to a professional therapist. A special notation if you are coping with sexual abuse: you may believe because the abuse happened decades ago, there is nothing you can do about it now. Ignoring painful feelings may have been adaptive at the time the abuse happened (a child lacks control over the abuse). However, continuing to avoid bad feelings as an adult can lead women to stay in painful situations. Ignoring the abuse can put you at further risk for depression.
Guidelines for finding a counselor:
Seek a counselor that is Christian, or offers a spirituality component. Locate a counselor who takes the opportunity to take you to the Word of God, to teach you about the character and ways of God, to help you see the necessity of total surrender to Jesus Christ as Lord. Charles Stanley said, “If it’s (psychotherapy) not based on the Word of God, all you have is just somebody’s opinion, you have some ways or some steps, but apart from God, they’re still depending upon themselves. If you leave God out of it, it becomes: "what can I do?"
Ask for a personal referral. Ideally, try to get a recommendation from a therapist's client. If you can't find that, ask your doctor or pastor for a few names. Look for a licensed psychologist, social worker, or family therapist who shares your values and faith (psychiatrists typically don't do much counseling).
Evaluate. After your first visit, ask yourself: Did I feel heard and valued? Did I feel comfortable? If you answer no to any of these, keep searching for the right fit. It may be a good idea to give a therapist a second chance if you feel hurt or upset.
Finances and logistics. Is this counselor covered by your insurance policy? Is the cost doable? Typically, psychologists are most expensive, followed by social workers and family therapists. Is the office location convenient for you?
This is an excerpt from the devotional book: I’m God’s Girl? Why Can’t I Feel It?
Check out my website: www.olivebranchoutreach.com/edindex.htlm for lots of inspiration, Scripture and help.
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Battle Depression with Thankfulness
Whether we realize it or not, today we have many things to be joyful for:
If you woke up this morning with more health than illness, you are more blessed than the million people who won't survive the week.
If you have never experienced the danger of battle, the loneliness of imprisonment, the agony of torture, or the pangs of starvation, you are ahead of twenty million people around the world.
If you attend church without fear of harassment, arrest, torture, or death, you are more blessed than almost three billion people in the world.
If you have food in your refrigerator, clothes on your back, a roof over your head, and a place to sleep, you are richer than seventy-five percent of this world.
If you have money in the bank and in your wallet, you are among the top eight percent of the world’s wealthy.
If your parents are still married, you are very rare, especially in the USA.
If you hold up your head with a smile on your face and are truly thankful, you are blessed because the majority can, but most do not.
If you can hold someone's hand, hug them, or touch them on the shoulder, you are blessed because you can offer God's healing touch.
If you can read this, you are more blessed than over two billion people in the world that cannot read anything at all.
If you woke up this morning with more health than illness, you are more blessed than the million people who won't survive the week.
If you have never experienced the danger of battle, the loneliness of imprisonment, the agony of torture, or the pangs of starvation, you are ahead of twenty million people around the world.
If you attend church without fear of harassment, arrest, torture, or death, you are more blessed than almost three billion people in the world.
If you have food in your refrigerator, clothes on your back, a roof over your head, and a place to sleep, you are richer than seventy-five percent of this world.
If you have money in the bank and in your wallet, you are among the top eight percent of the world’s wealthy.
If your parents are still married, you are very rare, especially in the USA.
If you hold up your head with a smile on your face and are truly thankful, you are blessed because the majority can, but most do not.
If you can hold someone's hand, hug them, or touch them on the shoulder, you are blessed because you can offer God's healing touch.
If you can read this, you are more blessed than over two billion people in the world that cannot read anything at all.
Monday, January 4, 2010
Depression: A Spiritual Crisis
What is your chief concern in life right now? Most likely you answered, “To have happiness or joy.”
There is a difference between happiness and joy. The word “joy” is used 224 times in the Bible (NIV), whereas the words “happy” and “happiness” combined are used only thirty times. That is not a coincidence. Happiness is dependant on circumstances, like a job promotion, or getting married, or finding out you are pregnant. Ralph Waldo Trine wrote, "To get up each morning with the resolve to be happy... is to set our own conditions to the events of each day."
Joy is different. It is dependant on a relationship with God. Jesus, preparing the disciples for his departure said, “You're going to be in deep mourning. You'll be sad, very sad, but your sadness will develop into joy. When a woman gives birth, she has a hard time, there's no getting around it. “But when the baby is born, there is joy in the birth.” John 16:20-21 If you’ve endured childbirth, you understand Jesus’ point.
Many see depression today as more a spiritual crisis when the issue becomes; What am I here for? Where is joy and laughter in life? What’s my purpose?
Before lasting peace and joy can be found, we must answer these questions.
Christian psychotherapist Dr. Les Carter agrees that a modest amount of depression can be a sign of a hungry spirit. He wrote, “Life is a journey, and our efforts to relate appropriately are meaningless if we do not stay focused on where we come from and where we are going.”
We’re all spiritual beings. It is when our spirit unites with God’s that we find true peace, joy, and fulfillment. Depression can even produce insight and wisdom that can be had in no other way.
From his years of experience caring for the depressed, Dr. Walter Johnson wrote, “Although I am convinced, and indeed scientific evidence is very strong in this area, that in many cases biological factors are a predominant cause of depression, I am very insistent that spiritual counseling is of the utmost importance in treating depressed individuals in conjunction, when necessary, with antidepressant medications.”
This is an excerpt from the devotional book: I’m God’s Girl? Why Can’t I Feel It? I would recommend purchasing a self-help book on how to defeat depression God’s way and challenge negative thoughts. Learn to see the world in a hopeful, positive light.
There is a difference between happiness and joy. The word “joy” is used 224 times in the Bible (NIV), whereas the words “happy” and “happiness” combined are used only thirty times. That is not a coincidence. Happiness is dependant on circumstances, like a job promotion, or getting married, or finding out you are pregnant. Ralph Waldo Trine wrote, "To get up each morning with the resolve to be happy... is to set our own conditions to the events of each day."
Joy is different. It is dependant on a relationship with God. Jesus, preparing the disciples for his departure said, “You're going to be in deep mourning. You'll be sad, very sad, but your sadness will develop into joy. When a woman gives birth, she has a hard time, there's no getting around it. “But when the baby is born, there is joy in the birth.” John 16:20-21 If you’ve endured childbirth, you understand Jesus’ point.
Many see depression today as more a spiritual crisis when the issue becomes; What am I here for? Where is joy and laughter in life? What’s my purpose?
Before lasting peace and joy can be found, we must answer these questions.
Christian psychotherapist Dr. Les Carter agrees that a modest amount of depression can be a sign of a hungry spirit. He wrote, “Life is a journey, and our efforts to relate appropriately are meaningless if we do not stay focused on where we come from and where we are going.”
We’re all spiritual beings. It is when our spirit unites with God’s that we find true peace, joy, and fulfillment. Depression can even produce insight and wisdom that can be had in no other way.
From his years of experience caring for the depressed, Dr. Walter Johnson wrote, “Although I am convinced, and indeed scientific evidence is very strong in this area, that in many cases biological factors are a predominant cause of depression, I am very insistent that spiritual counseling is of the utmost importance in treating depressed individuals in conjunction, when necessary, with antidepressant medications.”
This is an excerpt from the devotional book: I’m God’s Girl? Why Can’t I Feel It? I would recommend purchasing a self-help book on how to defeat depression God’s way and challenge negative thoughts. Learn to see the world in a hopeful, positive light.
The Problem with Perfectionism
Negative thinking says, I must be painstakingly competent and perfect in order to consider myself worthwhile. I must work hard to be loved. Add to that: I am a perfectionist.
We live in a world that defines a person's value and worth by productivity. How much we get done and how well we do it are the benchmarks of a successful day. This doesn't come without a cost. One of the leading causes of depression is having standards so high you cannot live up to them.
Defined as anxious slavery or slow suicide, perfectionists feel they need to prove their value to avoid the threat of rejection. Guilty!
There is a certain amount of tension in every Christian's mind concerning the biblical call to perfection. In one compartment of the brain there's a tug to live up to all the standards of Christ, but then on the other side, our attempts to measure up to those standards are always flawed.
As a ministry leader often I find myself falling back into the perfection rut, feeling I have to meet some very high expectations. What has been very freeing to me is to realize that when God called me to ministry he knew what he was getting. A couple months down the road he didn’t say, “Bad decision. I shouldn’t have called her!” Companies say that. People say that. Not God. That’s the freedom of grace. You are already completely acceptable to God as imperfect as you are. Thank you Jesus!
God defines personhood and success very differently than our culture does. The measure of our life is not where we live, how we look, or how well we sew or cook. From his perspective, success is measured by what kind of person we are, even in the midst of life's challenges.
God’s grace is greater than our imperfections, than our sin, and far greater than Satan (Rom. 5:20-21). “Christ redeemed [freed] us from the curse of the law [the curse of perfectionism] by becoming a curse for us” (Gal. 3:13, my emphasis). Jesus Christ became (past tense) the curse for us, freeing us from all perfectionistic law traps. Perfection means a perfect union with God for which we were created.
Banish the perfectionista in you! James 3:2 proclaims we all stumble in many ways. Nobody, apart from God, is perfect. People will always fail, disappoint and hurt us. We will make mistakes, even humiliate ourselves. God gives us an incredible gift when we become his daughter—grace. Today, give yourself grace.
If perfectionism has lead to significant problems with depression, anxiety, eating disorders, or difficulties in your relationships, you may want to consider working through one of the books I’ve written: http://www.olivebranchoutreach.com/shopping.htm
You may want to seek expert help from an experienced mental health professional, such as a psychologist or psychiatrist. Your family doctor is a good place to start if you are looking for a referral.
This is an excerpt from “Breaking the Cover Girl Mask.”
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Is there hope for my depression?
With the holidays behind us life should be turning back to “normal.” But I know for many, they were brought down by the blues or depression because of the holidays and cannot seem to find “normal.” I believe the holidays remind us of how lonely many of us are.
Dr. Robert McGee, author of Search for Significance wrote, “Loneliness has already reached epidemic proportions … 92% of Christians attending a Bible conference admitted that feelings of loneliness are a major problem in their lives. All shared a basic symptom: a sense of despair at feeling unloved and fear of being unwanted or unaccepted. ”
What a tragic commentary. A study published in the journal, The Archives of General Psychiatry suggested that about one in four people diagnosed with depression might instead be struggling with emotions associated with the loss of a loved one, or a job, or some other event in the person's life-- the blues. Many people describe themselves as depressed when they are really discouraged or unhappy or lonely.
Depression can be brought on by biochemistry as well as the loss of a loved one, unemployment, or even a bout of ill health. When we lose the ability to enjoy things, or feel badly about ourselves, believing we do not deserve to be happy, or feel guilty for no reason, or blame ourselves for something we had no part in, this is when we are likely to experience depression. Depression goes beyond the blues. Depression is generally a result of anger turned inward and/or a deep sense of loss.
You may have the blues, or be genuinely depressed. In either case, lost in your feelings you are clinging to a thread of hope that something or someone will break through the fog of despair because we all have the desire to have joy in our lives. But I have good news! God is throwing your soul an anchor.
If we don’t have union with God, life holds no hope. Recovery simply means recovering God’s plan for our life. It takes courage to step forward and say, “I want help to be free from my burdens.” This journey requires we follow God willingly, and trust him to lead us safely through the pain and around unseen obstacles. He knows the safest and best route. The word journey is repeated to convey that change doesn’t happen overnight. God doesn’t always work in the way that seems most logical to us. Instead of guiding the Israelites along the most direct route from Egypt to the Promised Land, He took them on a longer route.
However, everyday you can enjoy the place where you are while you travel down this road. Nothing is as heartbreaking as wasted grief. We can be determined to learn from it, rather than be bound by it. Along the way you will find out who you really are --God’s Girl.
This is an excerpt from the devotional book: I’m God’s Girl? Why Can’t I Feel It? I would recommend purchasing a self-help book on how to defeat depression God’s way and challenge negative thoughts. Learn to see the world in a hopeful, positive light.
For Christ-based help consider working through one of the books I’ve written: http://www.olivebranchoutreach.com/shopping.htm
• I’m God’s Girl? Why Can’t I Feel It? Daily Biblical Encouragement to Defeat Depression & the Blues
• Breaking the Cover Girl Mask: Toss Out Toxic Thoughts
You may want to seek expert help from an experienced mental health professional, such as a psychologist or psychiatrist. Your family doctor is a good place to start if you are looking for a referral.
Dr. Robert McGee, author of Search for Significance wrote, “Loneliness has already reached epidemic proportions … 92% of Christians attending a Bible conference admitted that feelings of loneliness are a major problem in their lives. All shared a basic symptom: a sense of despair at feeling unloved and fear of being unwanted or unaccepted. ”
What a tragic commentary. A study published in the journal, The Archives of General Psychiatry suggested that about one in four people diagnosed with depression might instead be struggling with emotions associated with the loss of a loved one, or a job, or some other event in the person's life-- the blues. Many people describe themselves as depressed when they are really discouraged or unhappy or lonely.
Depression can be brought on by biochemistry as well as the loss of a loved one, unemployment, or even a bout of ill health. When we lose the ability to enjoy things, or feel badly about ourselves, believing we do not deserve to be happy, or feel guilty for no reason, or blame ourselves for something we had no part in, this is when we are likely to experience depression. Depression goes beyond the blues. Depression is generally a result of anger turned inward and/or a deep sense of loss.
You may have the blues, or be genuinely depressed. In either case, lost in your feelings you are clinging to a thread of hope that something or someone will break through the fog of despair because we all have the desire to have joy in our lives. But I have good news! God is throwing your soul an anchor.
If we don’t have union with God, life holds no hope. Recovery simply means recovering God’s plan for our life. It takes courage to step forward and say, “I want help to be free from my burdens.” This journey requires we follow God willingly, and trust him to lead us safely through the pain and around unseen obstacles. He knows the safest and best route. The word journey is repeated to convey that change doesn’t happen overnight. God doesn’t always work in the way that seems most logical to us. Instead of guiding the Israelites along the most direct route from Egypt to the Promised Land, He took them on a longer route.
However, everyday you can enjoy the place where you are while you travel down this road. Nothing is as heartbreaking as wasted grief. We can be determined to learn from it, rather than be bound by it. Along the way you will find out who you really are --God’s Girl.
This is an excerpt from the devotional book: I’m God’s Girl? Why Can’t I Feel It? I would recommend purchasing a self-help book on how to defeat depression God’s way and challenge negative thoughts. Learn to see the world in a hopeful, positive light.
For Christ-based help consider working through one of the books I’ve written: http://www.olivebranchoutreach.com/shopping.htm
• I’m God’s Girl? Why Can’t I Feel It? Daily Biblical Encouragement to Defeat Depression & the Blues
• Breaking the Cover Girl Mask: Toss Out Toxic Thoughts
You may want to seek expert help from an experienced mental health professional, such as a psychologist or psychiatrist. Your family doctor is a good place to start if you are looking for a referral.
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