Freedom through Forgiveness

Unforgiveness is guaranteed to hinder our growth because it plants roots of bitterness in our heart. It’s like pouring acid in us, a caustic substance that eats through our heart. Why is it so hard for us to “forgive and forget” the injuries of life?

God never promised any of us freedom from pain. We can begin to find happiness if we free our mind of resentment and bitterness—put the past behind and see the process as empowering. you can hold that person responsible, harbor hatred, and consequently, carry feelings of anger forever. Or you can begin healing when you chose to forgive. In order to heal, we must forgive again and again—the big wrongs and the little ones. The alternative is to hold on to hatred and bitterness, which eventually will hurt all our relationships. Give yourself grace.

Sheila Walsh wrote, “In my situation, as long as I was unwilling to let go and forgive, there was still a nail in my wrist, and every time I talked to someone about the situation, it cut in a little deeper." It is our responsibility to pull out that nail. Many people won’t choose to forgive. They live unhappy lives of bitterness and unforgiveness.

Dr. Gregory Jantz says, If the child of the past and the adult of the present are to integrate fully into the person of the future, there comes a time when both must release the hurts of the past. This doesn’t mean that you forget what has been done to you, but that you forgive those responsible, whether they deserve your forgiveness or not. Forgiveness is the final destination on your healing journey. The road that lies beyond is one of health.

What is your greatest battle with forgiveness?
What lack of forgiveness or bitterness is still attached to you?

Read this excerpt from “I’m Beautiful? Why Can’t I See It?” by Kimberly Davidson.

How to Help a Loved One Overcome Depression

For those suffering from depression, the support of friends and family members can be crucial to recovery. Depression is a medical condition that usually improves with treatment. Those with depression need the support to recover and faith in the Word of God.

In the Bible David provincially wrote, “Weeping may go on all night, but in the morning there is joy” (Psalm 30: 5). He wrote a majority of these heartfelt psalms. Like us, David describes his depression as being a pit. But, he also knew God’s promise of deliverance despite his present despair.

Our emotional and spiritual life is full of peaks and valleys, and we want immediate relief and answers. But, often, as with David, the Lord calls us to wait, which is the hardest part. Look ahead to the future. There is a way out. Thank God for where he will take you!

If you are worried about a loved one with depression, know how to recognize the symptoms of depression and worsening depression, offer emotional and practical support, and know what to do if suicide seems likely. Speak to the person about their symptoms and feelings, and encourage them to seek treatment from a psychologist or counselor.

This is an excerpt from the book: I'm God's GIrl? Why Can't I Feel It? Check out my website: www.olivebranchoutreach.com.htlm for inspiration, Scripture and help.

Your body believes every word you say!

We do not merely experience anger in our minds, we feel it biologically in our body—our muscles tense and stomachs ache. Understanding ourselves, and other people, is critical to mind change and our overall growth. If we were to look at our brain, we may see a dark abscess caused by the stronghold of anger. The same is true for envy, anxiety, lust, fear, depression, and other emotions.

The Bible says, “A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones” (Prov. 14:30). There is a direct correlation between pessimistic, toxic thinking and illness. If we do not have a change of mind, we can actually make ourselves sick! Our body truly speaks our mind.

Becoming aware of our negative thinking patterns is the first step in being able to replace them with truth based patterns of thought. There are two things we must do daily:

(1) Identify & interrogate the negative things and lies you say to yourself, thereby enabling yourself to replace distortions with truth, found in the Word of God.
(2) Submit your thoughts to Christ. This means consciously handing over anxiety, worry, pain, and bitterness. He stands prepared to take your load and break the chains of thought-bondage if you let him.

Socrates said the unexamined life is not worth living. Through prayer and self-examination, we can learn to submit our struggles because they are impossible to conquer in our own strength. Do you have an attitude of willingness to expose and examine your flaws?

This is an excerpt from the book: Breaking the Cover Girl Mask
Check out my website: www.olivebranchoutreach.com/edindex.htlm for lots of inspiration, Scripture and help.

Depression strategy: recognize negative thoughts, feelings of being low and sad and take action!

Old thinking says: I can do it by myself! Or, we may use Scarlett O’Hara’s method of dealing with reality (Gone With The Wind): “I’ll think about that tomorrow.” God is challenging us not to go this alone. We need him and other people. Think and pray about beginning to connect with friends and church if you aren’t doing so. A small fellowship group or Bible study is an excellent resource for sharing, encouragement, and comfort. God wants all of us to be in an environment where we can experience his love through our relationships with other believers.

Secondly, you may feel now is the time to talk to a professional therapist. A special notation if you are coping with sexual abuse: you may believe because the abuse happened decades ago, there is nothing you can do about it now. Ignoring painful feelings may have been adaptive at the time the abuse happened (a child lacks control over the abuse). However, continuing to avoid bad feelings as an adult can lead women to stay in painful situations. Ignoring the abuse can put you at further risk for depression.

Guidelines for finding a counselor:

Seek a counselor that is Christian, or offers a spirituality component. Locate a counselor who takes the opportunity to take you to the Word of God, to teach you about the character and ways of God, to help you see the necessity of total surrender to Jesus Christ as Lord. Charles Stanley said, “If it’s (psychotherapy) not based on the Word of God, all you have is just somebody’s opinion, you have some ways or some steps, but apart from God, they’re still depending upon themselves. If you leave God out of it, it becomes: "what can I do?"

Ask for a personal referral. Ideally, try to get a recommendation from a therapist's client. If you can't find that, ask your doctor or pastor for a few names. Look for a licensed psychologist, social worker, or family therapist who shares your values and faith (psychiatrists typically don't do much counseling).

Evaluate. After your first visit, ask yourself: Did I feel heard and valued? Did I feel comfortable? If you answer no to any of these, keep searching for the right fit. It may be a good idea to give a therapist a second chance if you feel hurt or upset.

Finances and logistics. Is this counselor covered by your insurance policy? Is the cost doable? Typically, psychologists are most expensive, followed by social workers and family therapists. Is the office location convenient for you?
This is an excerpt from the devotional book: I’m God’s Girl? Why Can’t I Feel It?
Check out my website: www.olivebranchoutreach.com/edindex.htlm for lots of inspiration, Scripture and help.

Is there hope for my depression?

With the holidays behind us life should be turning back to “normal.” But I know for many, they were brought down by the blues or depression because of the holidays and cannot seem to find “normal.” I believe the holidays remind us of how lonely many of us are.

Dr. Robert McGee, author of Search for Significance wrote, “Loneliness has already reached epidemic proportions … 92% of Christians attending a Bible conference admitted that feelings of loneliness are a major problem in their lives. All shared a basic symptom: a sense of despair at feeling unloved and fear of being unwanted or unaccepted. ”

What a tragic commentary. A study published in the journal, The Archives of General Psychiatry suggested that about one in four people diagnosed with depression might instead be struggling with emotions associated with the loss of a loved one, or a job, or some other event in the person's life-- the blues. Many people describe themselves as depressed when they are really discouraged or unhappy or lonely.

Depression can be brought on by biochemistry as well as the loss of a loved one, unemployment, or even a bout of ill health. When we lose the ability to enjoy things, or feel badly about ourselves, believing we do not deserve to be happy, or feel guilty for no reason, or blame ourselves for something we had no part in, this is when we are likely to experience depression. Depression goes beyond the blues. Depression is generally a result of anger turned inward and/or a deep sense of loss.

You may have the blues, or be genuinely depressed. In either case, lost in your feelings you are clinging to a thread of hope that something or someone will break through the fog of despair because we all have the desire to have joy in our lives. But I have good news! God is throwing your soul an anchor.

If we don’t have union with God, life holds no hope. Recovery simply means recovering God’s plan for our life. It takes courage to step forward and say, “I want help to be free from my burdens.” This journey requires we follow God willingly, and trust him to lead us safely through the pain and around unseen obstacles. He knows the safest and best route. The word journey is repeated to convey that change doesn’t happen overnight. God doesn’t always work in the way that seems most logical to us. Instead of guiding the Israelites along the most direct route from Egypt to the Promised Land, He took them on a longer route.

However, everyday you can enjoy the place where you are while you travel down this road. Nothing is as heartbreaking as wasted grief. We can be determined to learn from it, rather than be bound by it. Along the way you will find out who you really are --God’s Girl.

This is an excerpt from the devotional book: I’m God’s Girl? Why Can’t I Feel It? I would recommend purchasing a self-help book on how to defeat depression God’s way and challenge negative thoughts. Learn to see the world in a hopeful, positive light.
For Christ-based help consider working through one of the books I’ve written: http://www.olivebranchoutreach.com/shopping.htm
• I’m God’s Girl? Why Can’t I Feel It? Daily Biblical Encouragement to Defeat Depression & the Blues
• Breaking the Cover Girl Mask: Toss Out Toxic Thoughts

You may want to seek expert help from an experienced mental health professional, such as a psychologist or psychiatrist. Your family doctor is a good place to start if you are looking for a referral.